And the bottom falls out...Last weekend we were cruising along in ttwd. He was stepping up and calling me out on things that were affecting us and I was submitting to his decisions and respecting his perspective. Then this weekend...nothing.
We were on our way to the grocery store and I was ready to go. He decided that he was hungry and going to get a yogurt. I got frustrated that he wasn't ready and had been sitting on the laptop instead of getting ready. When we got in the van I proceeded to tell him how irritated I was. When I stopped I asked if he was now not speaking to me. He said when I was finished yelling at him, he would talk to me. So I stopped and he said nothing. Nothing was said all the way to the store and nothing was really said at the store or on the way home either.
So that's how it went all day...Not much talking other than when completely necessary...Not fun! So at the prodding of the lovely Wilma, I went to try to talk to him again...It was a very long conversation. John has mild forms of epilepsy and fibromyalgia. When he gets stressed they flare up and so last night it was very difficult to have a conversation.
Truth be told I couldn't even really remember why we weren't talking. So I said as much to him. He informed me that I had an attitude all day and wasn't being very kind to him...He was right. I HATE admitting that! He said that he felt like we had went back to pre-ttwd. For whatever reason, he didn't deal with it and it had just escalated.
He decided that a punishment was in order for my attitude. Again THAT word! It's gonna be the end of me! Unfortunately, because he had let himself get so stressed over it all, he was not physically able to follow through last night. So now we have a punishment hanging overhead :( I am trying to not let it affect my ATTITUDE as I don't want to be in more trouble.
I must admit, I get a frustrated with him because he knows what will happen if he doesn't deal with things fairly quickly. He knows how it affects him physically. On the other hand I feel extremely guilty that my behavior caused all the stress that led to his pain :( Hopefully as we continue he will become more consistent which will limit the amount of pain he has to endure...
So to sum it all up...IT'S ALL WILMA'S FAULT! She insisted I talk to him and had I just went to bed it would've been too late (as he has to let me know by the end of the night if there is anything I am in trouble for...his rule) Now I'm awaiting a spanking! Thanks Wilma! Just kidding...thanks for the "ear" and your friendship.
NICE! You SAID you weren't going to do that! Sheesh.
ReplyDeleteAs for your anxiety and sassiness awaiting said punishment--remember the tampon commercial! Field of flowers! lmbo!
Disclaimer: again don't focus on the product-just the ridiculous images they try to pass off while using said product
LOL! Thanks for all your help these last couple of days...I may have just quit without you :)
DeleteOn a side note - my indian princess, field of flowers dancing around a moat of happy singing gators (that is how it went, right?) talked to John last night...we're good ")
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NO GATORS !... condescending Geiko Gecko Yoda with a British accent. AND when you actually put all that in print, it makes me sound like I was having an acid flashback, despite never having taken any.
DeleteANYWAY.....yay on being 'good'! <- you and John that is...YOU being good- well good luck with that.
Willie
Yes well Willie the indian princess...didn't sound much better lol! but it did make me laugh and I desperately needed that last night :D
DeleteAnd I'm trying to be good! It just seems to come easier to some than others...I find it to be a bit elusive!
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I just said it to Christina, saying it to you too. Sorry Girl.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sunnygirl! It's my own fault...but onward and upward, right?
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Tough one.
ReplyDeleteHopefully, it will clear the air and everything will be good again....that is the best thing that spanking does....it also hurts - so that will be a bummer (sorry)
hugs
lillie
Well...the spanking had to be postponed again. John was not feeling well last night (he's been a bit under the weather all weekend), but we were able to talk and that was good.
DeleteHugs back at ya Lillie :)
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I have said it before, and I will say it again...that WILMA is nothing but trouble ;) You have been warned..... bwhahahaha!
ReplyDeleteNo, really...I think you did the right thing. If you would have went to sleep....you would have gotten that angry simmer going that tends to make things seem so much worse than what they really are. The spanking will hurt (sorry) but atleast it will kind of put things back where they need to be.
And btw, the number one thing I get spanked for around here is attitude....I hear that word a lot too....don't be like me!!
Hugs...
Lucy
Not Lucy! You couldn't possibly have an attitude problem...well at least I'm in good company :) (you know the whole misery loves company thing, right?...sorry!) Wilma really can't take the blame for all of this. Sadly, it was my own bad ATTITUDE! (Have I mentioned how much I LOVE that word?)
DeleteThanks for the hugs...they were needed around here this weekend
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um, how come this *****Wilma really can't take the blame for all of this.***** isn't in bold print like the original accusation? Hmmmmm? Like a retraction buried deep in a newspaper after a front page story comment. SHEESH. *wink* Lucy doesn't believe it anyway :)
DeleteWell you know how those retractions go! Lol!
DeleteI'll be nice and say don't blame Wilma lol She gave GOOD advice ... well ,,, well, not sure about the tampon part lol
ReplyDeleteSeriously P, you did the right thing. As Lucy said, not talking before going to bed would have made things worse.
Delays are tough and I'm sorry you are feeling guilty and hope this will resolve those feelings for you.
Hugs
Roz
Thanks Roz! Wilma was a great help this weekend.
DeleteUnfortunately we are still awaiting punishment...John has not been feeling well this weekend and wasn't up to it last night...maybe tonight...we shall see
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Dealing with inconsistency can be hard, that's for sure. But, just as we're not perfect, neither are our husbands. I get upset with Michael when he lets things slide and things escalate, but the reality is, I'm just as responsible for it as he is. Ugh. Ttwd is not easy sometimes, that's for sure. I hope things get resolved soon and you're both feeling better!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the support Grace. And you're right I have to remember that he's not perfect. And this is definitely one of the hardest things I've ever had to do!
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I do hope you're both feeling better very soon.
ReplyDeleteThanks June! We will get through this like everything else we face. Talking (although not always fun...is helpful)
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lol, no, not always fun, but essential. We still have our moments - quite recently in fact. But in the end, it's better ... always better. (((hugs)))
DeleteI don't know about you, but my "end" is rarely ever better for our talks! lol But I do know what you mean
DeleteHugs
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P dear sorry you are having a rough time - delayed punishments just suck.
ReplyDeleteThere was a comment made on another post regarding inconsistency and an HoH commented back - I would appreciate more consistency in my wife's behavior. (Don't remember whose post or the HoH) but the comment really stuck in my head whenever I read someone wishing for more consistency from her HoH. Something to think about?
Blessings,
Cat
They do suck don't they! And currently I am still waiting...Ugh!
DeleteI like that statement...but I am pretty consistent (it's just not on the good side yet...) I appreciate your words of wisdom.
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My first visit to your blog! :)
ReplyDeleteSo sorry you have a punishment hanging overhead. I *hate* that! Glad you guys did talk it out. And I hope he feels better soon
Hugs,
Elle
Welcome Elle! Oh yes we talked and talked and talked...well you get the point. I think we do that A LOT since beginning ttwd. (And here I thought it was going to be all sex and spanking!) Even though the punishment is still looming I do feel better for finally communicating effectively. Sometimes we talk, but are not communicating well.
DeleteHugs back at ya
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I've seen Willie being blamed for a few things lately. HUmmm... :)
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear what stress does to your husband physically and how he then can't follow through and what all that does to you. Hard all around. I hope things are okay by now!
I know! That Willie can be a trouble maker! lol
DeleteYes it can be very stressful and usually sends me down guilt lane. The odd thing is that when he handles discipline quickly and doesn't second guess himself, etc. he doesn't experience the stress or side effects of it. Being more consistent is something that would benefit his physical well being as well as our marriage. But he is getting better and we are still VERY new to all this. Speaking of...Happy DDversary! So thankful to have ladies like you around here who have been able to get through the tough beginnings of ttwd who can offer advice and support.
Hugs
P
hope it wasnt too bad for you
ReplyDeleteHi trazuredpet! Thanks for stopping in. And actually it didn't happen...it explain it all in the post I just put up, but to make a long story short...I got a pass.
ReplyDeletePlease come back and visit again soon :)
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